Writing this post on a Tuesday evening from my dining table, also known as, my desk. It’s been a quiet day at home, working on my laptop and planning tomorrow’s shootings.
As I said one or two posts ago, I’ve started meditating. I’ve known meditation for a long time, as one of my aunts is really into all things spiritual. She’s my most special person in this world, you may get to meet her someday. From my family, she’s the person to whom I feel most connected and close. She was the person who encouraged me to discover my inner side so she’s behind half the things I’ve achieved spiritually. Therefore, she is the reason why I started meditating.
I’ve been curious about meditation for quite some time but I just never found the moment to do it, or in other words, I always had excuses to not meditate. However, as during November my stress was getting worse and worse and I could not switch my mind off work , I needed to do something about it. I tried going for long walks, exercising, writing, cleaning my flat… but nothing seemed to work. And I remembered that I knew meditation had been useful for my aunt. So it was the perfect moment to give it a try. Didn’t know if it was going to be of any help but I had to try it, no excuses this time.
I also remembered watching the youtube adverts about an app called HeadSpace (I remember I didn’t click the skip ad in any of them) and so I downloaded the app. Since the day I got it on my phone, I’ve already meditated for 60 minutes. Might not seem much time, but it’s been totally worth it. I’ve meditated at home, sat at my desk and on the sofa. I’ve also meditated at the park and believe me, allowing yourself 5 to 10 minutes a day to focus on you feels like magic.
I don’t meditate everyday and as I’ve just started I cannot ensure you that this is the “final” solution, but I feel better than when I started two weeks ago. Meditation is a process and I feel that it’s a never ending one, which actually makes me want to keep on doing it too. I’m learning to let thoughts come and go without judgement. To acknowledge them and let them go. I’m learning to focus my attention on one thing at a time and to not pay attention to what is not in my path. Most importantly, I’m allowing myself time for myself, letting my mind breath and also treating myself better.
I honestly don’t really care if this is a solution or not. Meditating is helping me and I feel like going forward. I feel better and in more in peace with myself. So I don’t care if I need to find something else in the future, I’ve found something that is good to me now and that’s what matters.